Make Room For The Stuttering

Sometimes you have one of those experiences where everything that happens is inter-connected and you just know that you were meant to be there. I had one of those experiences this past Friday evening. It probably was one of those “you had to be there moments”, but I think you will get how moving this was to me.

My friend Lisa takes a writing class, where the students learn how to sift through the moments of life, find ones with purpose and illustrate them in a way everyone can relate to. Lisa told me that the class is the best thing she has ever done for herself.

She wrote a brilliant piece about stuttering. The movie “The King’s Speech”  inspired her to put voice to her feelings that rocketed to the surface, and she wanted others to learn how different her reality is from Hollywood’s version. Her piece was so good it was published in our local newspaper.

Lisa was then asked to read her piece at a writer’s series held at our Arts Center, in conjunction with our community’s monthly “Troy Night Out”. She was torn about doing it, as her dad was having surgery that same day and she felt she needed to be with him. She also rarely puts her stuttering “out there”.

But it turns out dad told her, “don’t you dare cancel”, so she didn’t and accepted the challenge. She told me about it, and I wanted to be there. I suggested that I could record it, so if she wanted, she could watch it with her dad the next day.

Lisa said something like, “yeah, I probably won’t even watch it myself “, but said I could record if I wanted to. We agreed I would set the video settings to “private” and I would send her the link.

Several writing students were reading that night, so I sat back to listen and enjoy. I was also enjoying the teacher introduce each writer and talk a little about writing and her style. All of a sudden, this woman said something that sounded so familiar to me.

I thought, “where did I hear that before?’ And suddenly I realized I was listening to the author of a book I had just finished reading two weeks ago. How ironic! It was a book about writing, and I remember reading in the preface that this woman has taught a sold-out writing class for 10 years. I had no idea that this was who I would meet later in the evening.

Before it was Lisa’s turn to read her piece, I had double-checked that it was still OK to record. And I went up to the teacher and mentioned I was going to record and asked if it was OK. She said it was fine, as long as Lisa agreed, and she thanked me for asking.

As she was introduced, I quietly readied my Flip recorder and pressed record as Lisa began. She explained why she wrote this essay, and then read her beautiful piece, in her own distinct voice. Within seconds, I was so moved and overcome with joy and pride for my friend. I made no effort at all to wipe away the tears as they openly rolled down my cheeks.

When she finished, the audience applauded and I gently pressed stop on the recorder. Her presence and courageous voice lingered in the room.

Afterwards, I met some of Lisa’s friends, but scooted out pretty quickly. This was her moment. As I headed out, the teacher was down by the door, chatting with some folks. I hesitated, then decided to wait and see if I could speak with her a moment.

I introduced myself as a friend of Lisa’s and reminded her I was the one who had asked permission to record. I shared with her that I realized I had just read her book, and what a coincidence that was. I told her I was a blogger, and she said she was too.

She told me about The Sister Project, which celebrates and highlights unique ventures or stories of women. I told her about the podcast, “Women Who Stutter: Our Stories” and she asked me to email my information, as she would love to write a piece about my work and link it to her blog.

When I got home, I uploaded and saved Lisa’s reading.  I also watched it twice more, and still welled up with tears of pride for my friend. I emailed her the private link, encouraging her to share it with her dad.

The next day, Lisa emailed me, saying she had watched it and was happy with how it came out. She had also shared it with her mom, who also cried, tears of pride. I told her about the coincidence of having read her teacher’s book, and she told me that people had come up to her and congratulated her for putting a voice to her written words.

She also shared that a man who had been sitting right behind me asked her if I was the same person who had done a workshop at the library last month. Lisa told him, yes, that was me. The man told her he stuttered and had done therapy and largely has it under control. But he said he applauded “people like us” (unicorns as Lisa calls us) who stutter openly and let the world see us as we are.

What a night of coincidences! I was meant to be there. It was profoundly meaningful for me to witness my friend take a huge leap out of her comfort zone. And that meaning became crystal clear when she emailed me and asked me to “unlock” the link – that she was going to post it her self on her own personal blog. Sweet! I was honored to be there!

You can see Lisa’s Reading here. Bravo Lisa! I am proud to know you!