Make Room For The Stuttering

Posts Tagged ‘talking about stuttering

This past Saturday I gave a presentation about covert stuttering to a group of mostly speech language pathologists and students studying to be SLPs. This was for the the New York State Speech Language Hearing Association. I spoke about my journey from covert to overt stuttering and how SLPs can best support people who covertly stutter.

There was a lot of interest in how and why I went from covert to overt and there were quite a few questions during my presentation. I also had a few activities for the group to do which illustrated covert stuttering. I quickly realized I had too much material and was going to run out of time. As the group wanted to ask questions, I allotted the last half hour for just that, and ditched the rest of my formal presentation.

An older woman asked me a question toward the end. She didn’t identify herself as a SLP, but I’m pretty sure she was. She prefaced her question with, “You’re not going to like this but . . . ” and then asked the question. She asked, “Don’t you want to be more fluent? Wouldn’t you benefit from speech therapy?”

I was kind of floored. Here I had been talking for almost 90 minutes about how liberating it had felt to finally come out of the stuttering closet and how I was happy with who I was. I responded honestly and said that speech therapy wasn’t a goal of mine. I was most interested in being a comfortable and effective communicator and that I think one can be even with a stutter. I also said that I enjoyed public speaking more than I ever have and that I think I stutter fluently and that was enough for me.

She didn’t offer a response to my response but did come up to me at the conclusion of the presentation and thanked me and even gave me a hug. As did others. That felt great. One other SLP and professor came up to me and also hugged me and said that I was “almost there” with my effective communication. That kind of bothered me, but by that point, I was feeling really good and proud about my presentation.

What do you think? Has anyone asked you if you want to be more fluent? Do you think I answered the question well?

Last week I had a wonderful opportunity to speak to kids who stutter at a stuttering camp. The director had invited me to meet with the kids, ages 8-12, via Skype. Before my talk, the kids explored this blog and my podcast and prepared some questions.

The goal of the week was to get the kids talking about stuttering, to gain confidence and to learn how to create their own podcast.

My chat with the kids was great. They asked about how I feel when I stutter, if I ever get nervous when talking in front of people and what I’ve done to get comfortable talking. We had a real back and forth conversation and we all learned from each other. The kids had never met an adult who stutters. I think they thought it was cool!

Later in the day, the director emailed me. The kids were asked to reflect on their day and several said my talk was a highlight. One kid drew a picture to illustrate what the room looked like when I was talking to them via the computer.kids listening to Pam

Later in the week, the kids learned how to create a podcast and they did several, on all kinds of creative topics. They also presented on the last day to their parents and SLP students about facts on stuttering, what they learned during the week and what they’re thinking about for the new school year.

This was a unique opportunity for these children. They focused on talking and having fun and gaining skills and confidence. I was happy to have a small part in the week.

Six degrees of separation is the theory that everyone and everything is six or fewer steps away, by way of introduction, from any other person in the world, so that a chain of “a friend of a friend” statements can be made to connect any two people in a maximum of six steps.

I think the same theory exists in the stuttering community. Last week, I had the opportunity to meet so many wonderful people from all over the world at the joint conference of the National Stuttering Association (NSA) and the International Stuttering Association (ISA) in Atlanta, Georgia.

I did not get a chance to meet everyone I wanted to at the conference, but I feel I am just one introduction away from meeting those who I didn’t. I met Keisuke from Japan and he introduced me to another friend of his from Japan. Keisuke and I will work together on the board of the ISA and will likely really get to know one another. We had some trouble communicating because his English is not strong but we are connected through stuttering.

I met Bruce and John from Australia and felt an instant connection with both of them. We talked and laughed like we were old friends, but in fact we had just met. And it was great to meet Cameron, also from Australia. He is the author of the book, “First Person Shooter,” which I read and reviewed for this blog several months ago. When I finally met Cameron, I felt like I already knew him.

I have been in contact with Nancy from Western Australia who was going to come to the conference but her plans changed at the last minute. We had a chance to meet last night through Stutter Social – for the first time, she joined in the group video chat and we finally met and talked, and again, I felt like I’d already been connected to her.

It’s funny how connected we all are in the stuttering community. Technology has allowed our worlds to become much smaller and we connect through social media and Skype and Google Hangouts and it feels like we already know each other.

I can’t wait to continue to be introduced to more and more members of the community and share our similar stories. It is special to be so inter-connected with people world wide.

 

PamEpisode 154 features Sharon Steed who hails from Chicago, Illinois, and presently lives in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Sharon is a freelance business writer and also a professional speaker.

Sharon tells us that stuttering had such control over her life that she was terrified to speak to people. Sharon reached a point where she knew she needed to face her fear head on and she decided to tackle it by taking on public speaking.

Listen in as we discuss how Sharon has used speaking as a way to build business. She says “Being vulnerable and open helps you a lot more than it hurts you.” This applies to both business and stuttering.  We also talk about active listening, effective communication, empathy and patience. In fact, those are some of the topics Sharon has spoken about in her business talks.

Sharon wants others who stutter to know, “I struggle with it too. I’m not any more courageous than anyone else. I’m just willing to try and fail.”

Music used in today’s episode is credited to ccMixter. Below is a video of one of Sharon’s talks.

 

PamEpisode 152 features CiCi Adams, who hails from Pennsylvania, but is presently living in Brooklyn, New York. CiCi is a journalist at People Magazine and enjoys writing, dance and eating lots of Chinese food.

Listen in as we discuss what’s helped her to be OK with stuttering, how she handles interviews at work, interacting with other people who stutter and so much more.

CiCi is a member of the NYC National Stuttering Association chapters and talked about the one day conference that NSA NYC is sponsoring in May.

And Cici blogs. She wants her blog to grow. Please check her out at The Plight of the Stuttering Journalist and let her know you’ve visited by leaving a comment.

This was a great conversation with yet another amazing woman. I feel so lucky to be able to host this podcast. My life has been enriched by all of these women’s stories.

The music clip used in today’s episode is credited to ccMixter.

Interesting title, huh? What would giving blood have to do with stuttering?

Yesterday, I donated blood at a local blood drive. If you’ve never donated before, you might not be aware of how meticulous blood drive staff are about making absolutely sure they are identifying donated blood correctly. They ask you to state your full name at least 5 different times during the process. Usually, stating my name is not a problem, but yesterday my stuttering showed up big time by the fourth time I had to repeat my name.

When I was asked to state my name, it came out “P-P-P-Pamela.” The staff person snickered and asked if I was OK. To her credit, she did not ask if I had forgotten my name, as clearly I had not, since I had repeated it several times already. But her snicker annoyed me nonetheless. But I didn’t say anything. I gave her the benefit of the doubt that she wasn’t sure what she had just heard.

When I was asked the fifth time to repeat my name, out came “P-P-P-Pamela” again. This time she didn’t snicker but asked me if I was feeling woozy or lightheaded. I told her no, I just stutter. They hadn’t started drawing my blood yet, so I couldn’t have felt woozy or lightheaded yet.

When I told her I just stutter, she just nodded her head and looked slightly embarrassed but didn’t respond.

I was glad I said something to let her know I stutter. Hopefully I educated her a tiny bit and she’ll remember not to snicker or assume something the next time she encounters someone who stutters.

How have you handled similar situations when you’ve had to repeat your name several times? Would you have done something differently?

isad-20151-258x300Every year, International Stuttering Awareness Day (ISAD) is marked on October 22. It is a day when people who stutter all over the world participate in events and activities that raise awareness about stuttering and educate the non-stuttering public.

The International Stuttering Association also sponsors an annual online conference. From October 1 through October 22, a variety of presentations are available for people to read, watch or listen to, all with the goal of learning more about stuttering.

Both people who stutter and speech professionals contribute papers, audio and video that conference attendees can participate in and engage with the author. There is a discussion option where people can leave comments with the authors and get feedback or questions answered.

There is also an “Ask The Expert” section of the conference where speech professionals volunteer their time to respond to specific questions asked by anyone in the stuttering community or general public.

It is always a great conference, with enlightening topics from people who stutter themselves and professionals.

Don’t miss it! There’s something for everyone. The conference starts next week, Thursday October 1, 2015. I will have a paper in the conference this year. I hope you visit, read and leave your feedback.


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© Pamela A Mertz and Make Room For The Stuttering, 2009 - 2016. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Pamela A Mertz and Make Room For The Stuttering with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. Same protection applies to the podcasts linked to this blog, "Women Who Stutter: Our Stories" and "He Stutters: She Asks Him." Please give credit to owner/author Pamela A Mertz 2016.