Archive for the ‘Women Who Stutter Podcast’ Category
Episode 60 features Val Ostergaard, who hails from Cary, Illinois, which is northwest of Chicago. Val is 25 years old, graduated in May with her Masters degree in Speech Language Pathology from Illinois State University and will start a job as a school therapist in September.
This was a bit of a surprise to Val and her mom, as she always thought she was going to be a nurse. In her first year in college, she took an introduction to speech pathology course, and knew then that she was supposed to be a speech therapist.
Val is one of the original FRIENDS kids. She went to her first FRIENDS conference with her family when she was 13 years old.Val recalls being nervous and not really wanting to go, but her private therapist (Kristin Chmela) had recommended it and Val’s mom really wanted to go. The first conferences were only with 20 people and the evening activities were at someone’s home for a pool party.
Listen in as Val shares the unique perspective of having grown up with FRIENDS and seeing the organization grow and evolve into the national association it is now. Val shares how one year she and her brother actually chose a FRIENDS conference and gave up a promised trip to Disney World.
Val also shares how that same early conference in D.C. did not yet have a teen room for the kids to hang out together. She recalls all of the teens, girls and boys, hanging out in a large women’s bathroom at night, talking and playing card games.
We also discuss Val’s early speech therapy (a lot of it!), family involvement, sibling experience, courage, fears and worries about judgement.
I met Val at my first FRIENDS convention in 2008, and she has been an inspiration. Feel free to leave comments for Val or Pam. Feedback is a gift!
The podcast safe music used in today’s episode is credited to ccMixter.
By Accident – Episode 59
Posted on: June 20, 2011
Episode 59 features Maria, 28, who was born and raised in Eastern Europe. Maria presently lives in Liverpool, England, and is studying Human Resources Management.
Maria landed in the UK quite by accident! Listen in as she explains how a half-year commitment to a new job resulted in many changes.
Maria didn’t start stuttering until 12 years old. She shares that she didn’t get much support and no therapy. In fact, her family acted as if Maria’s stuttering didn’t exist, and Maria herself describes pretending she didn’t stutter.
She found therapy as an adult quite by accident as well! While browsing in a library one day, Maria picked up a book on self-development. One of the suggestions was to join Toastmasters. She did, and tells the story of how the President of that club quite assertively pulled her aside at her very first meeting and told her she must try a speech therapy program that he had attended, the McGuire Programme.
Maria attended a McGuire course one year ago, and tells us how both her speech and life have dramatically changed. She describes the feeling of “being let out of prison.” Maria has now done things she never thought possible, including many job interviews, taking a job as a receptionist and even tracking down relatives, which she would never do because of her fear of using the telephone.
Listen in to Maria’s accidental transformation from a shy, fearful hairdresser to the now confident, ambitious woman studying to become an HR Manager and living in a new country.
Credit for the podcast safe music used in this episode goes to ccMixter. Feel free to leave comments for Maria or Pam. Remember, feedback is a gift.
I Really Do Stutter – Episode 58
Posted on: June 10, 2011
Episode 58 features Sarah Bell from Garland, Texas, outside of Dallas. Sarah is a full-time mom to 20-month-old Ethan. She is studying a medical transcription class on-line, which she will complete in December. Sarah hopes to continue working from home, to be right there with Ethan!
Sarah and I first met at the NSA Conference in New Jersey in 2008. I recall being so impressed with Sarah sharing her story at the “Covert, Exposed” panel workshop. We were guests together in September 2008 on the Stuttertalk episode Pam and Sarah: Covert Stuttering (Episode 63).
Sarah shares her experience of being extremely covert, and wanting to be more open, but continually struggling with it. She talks about her childhood and why she tried to hide her stuttering.
She ponders the question of “fit” in the stuttering community. People who do not stutter or stutter overtly probably never consider this!
Sarah shares her self-help experiences, and recalls her first meeting of the Dallas NSA Chapter where she met Russ Hicks, who stutters differently than she does. We discuss the gamut of feelings one can have when meeting someone else who stutters for the first time. That “aha” moment of, “wow, I’m not the only one!”
Listen in as we discuss covert stuttering, denial, self-esteem and fear. We also discuss how important it is to not beat ourselves up when we go backwards and the need to be kind to ourselves. And worrying about whether Ethan might stutter as he begins talking.
The music clip “Gently” is credited to DanoSongs. Feel free to leave comments for Sarah and let her know what a great job she did! Feedback is a gift!
Episode 57 features Julia Ammon, who hails from Essex, England, which is about an hour from London. Julia is originally from Ormond-By-The Sea, Florida. She moved to the UK because she married a Brit and it was easier for her to move. Classic girl meets boy and moves far away!
Julia currently works as the Fund Raiser for the British Stammering Association, which is a charity (or non-profit as we call it in the US). She is the sole fund-raiser, and manages all of the ways that the BSA is supported.
Julia explains how she came to take this job, as it is challenging work that she was ready for. She had previously been at a temp job, that did not require much talking and she felt she was limiting herself.
Listen is an as we chat about family support, early speech therapy experiences in school, and how she learned about the McGuire therapy programme.
Julia’s mother-in-law suggested that Julia try The McGuire Programme after hearing about the success that UK singer-songwriter Gareth Gates had with it. Gates has talked about his stuttering publicly and is now a speech coach with McGuire.
We also chat about how Julia met her husband, which is a great story. They met on-line, long before internet dating became so popular . They had a long-distance relationship for 6 years before marrying. We conclude our great conversation by chatting about “being content”, making choices, and acceptance.
The podcast safe music “Echoed” used in this episode is credited to ccMixter. Please be sure to leave comments for Julia if you wish, or me! Feedback is a gift!
She Says So What! – Episode 56
Posted on: May 20, 2011
Episode 56 features Chloe Barnes, who hails from Northamptonshire, England. Chloe will soon be 20 years old, and is in her second year of University at Brighton, where she is studying to be a primary teacher.
Chloe and I were introduced by Perla Ernest, whom we met in Episode 45. Chloe identifies her stuttering as covert, appearing mostly when she is stressed or under pressure. She did not pursue therapy until two years ago, when she decided to try the McGuire program before heading to university.
Chloe has a wonderful sense of confidence and does not take herself too seriously. She also has a delightful sense of humor and engaging laugh, which you will hear many times throughout our conversation!
Listen in as we discuss meeting other people who stutter for the first time, and how others who stutter can serve as a mirror for us. We also discuss active listening, and how stuttering can make us poor listeners and even a bit self-absorbed.
Chloe talks about the support and coaching of the McGuire program, as well as how she uses voluntary stuttering. We also discuss being proud of our differences and being happy with our unique self. Chloe shares about joining the Drama Society at University and her all time favorite character she portrayed on stage.
The podcast safe music clip “Gently” is credited to DanoSongs. Feel free to leave comments for Chloe or just let her know how inspired you were by her story. Remember, feedback is a gift.
It’s A “We” Thing – Episode 55
Posted on: May 11, 2011
Episode 55 features Shelby Potts, who hails from Raleigh, North Carolina. She is 19 years old and just finished her sophomore year at Appalachian State University, located in Boone, NC. Shelby is studying communication disorders and hopes to become a speech pathologist.
This episode also features Shelby’s mom, Mary Ann Potts. She teaches ballet and modern dance at the Dancer’s Studio. She is also the assistant director of the Concert Dancers of Raleigh, teaches preschool music and movement and leads a cardio-class. But Mary Ann tells us right away that first she is a mom.
I met Shelby just a few weeks ago when I visited Dr. Joseph Klein’s graduate fluency class at Appalachian State in Boone. Shelby joined the class that evening, because she wanted to meet me. Talk about flattering!
Listen in to a wonderful mother-daughter perspective on the stuttering journey. Shelby honestly shares what has and has not worked for her in therapy. Mom is just as poignantly honest as she shares how it feels being a parent who wants nothing more than to ease her child’s pain, and the hard lessons learned along the way.
We talk about acceptance, meeting other people who stutter for the first time and moving from hiding out to speaking publicly about stuttering.
Team Potts also talks about how FRIENDS has been life-changing, and the powerful realization that they are a “we”. Sharing this journey has impacted them both and left Shelby well equipped to handle life as a young woman who stutters.
The music used in this episode is credited to ccMixter. Feel free to leave comments for Shelby and her mom. Or just let them know what a great job they did. Feedback is a gift.
Her Presence – Episode 54
Posted on: May 2, 2011
Episode 54 features Lisa Barone, who hails from Troy, New York via Los Angelos, CA and Long Island, New York. Lisa is the co-founder and Chief Branding Officer of Outspoken Media, an Internet marketing company based in Troy.
I met Lisa in a rather interesting way. Since I am a blogger, I read other blogs. About six months ago, I noticed Lisa commented on a blog that I had as well. Lisa had put her name and where she lives, and mentioned that she stutters. I realized we were only about 15 minutes away from each other. So, I took a chance and emailed her.
I started off with something to the effect, “I am not a stalker, I swear!” and went on to introduce myself and tell her a little about me. She responded back that she gets hundred of emails a day, and it was refreshing to get one that was “normal.” Little did she know!
I asked Lisa if she’d be interested in getting together somewhere to meet and talk. She said yes, we did, and we’ve been friends since. In that first meeting, Lisa shared with me that I was the first adult female stutterer she had ever met!
Since then, Lisa has met with more local stutterers by attending one of our local Chat & Chew Too meet-ups. She also had a newspaper article published about how she felt about the movie,” The King’s Speech”, called “The king and us, myths and all”. And she participated in a reading of her piece at The Arts Center of the Capital Region.
Listen in as Lisa and I discuss how stuttering has impacted every aspect of her life, but has never been her focal point. She discusses how she got into the business of providing a voice for others, and her feelings about “letting people down” when they meet her for the first time and realize that she is not the same “presence” that she is on-line. This is a very honest conversation that offers lots of food for thought and great insights.
The podcast safe music used in today’s episode is credited to ccMixter. Please consider leaving comments for Lisa or just letting her know what a terrific job she did. Remember, feedback is a gift.
Episode 53 features Claire, who hails from the Washington, DC area. Claire is 16 years old and a junior in high school.
She is interested in biology, and already knows she wants to pursue further education and a career path involving genetics, which combines her love for both biology and history.
I met Claire and her family at my first FRIENDS conference in 2008, but really didn’t get to know her well that first year. Since, I have seen her blossom into a very confident young person, who is at ease with herself as a woman who stutters. She’s a great role model for youth, especially girls, who stutter.
Listen in to a very candid conversation about Claire ‘s experiences with school therapy. She shares her frustration at working with therapists who did not seem to know much about stuttering, and how she knew more about stuttering than they did!
Claire shares about working with a metronome and how it seemed she was asked to replace one secondary behavior with another.Very important insights by a 16-year old!
We also discuss family impact, Claire’s relationship with her sister, and how important acceptance is. And as a 6-year member of FRIENDS, Claire shares what FRIENDS is all about, the life-changing significance of meeting other people her age that stutter, and how important self help and support is for parents as well.
Claire demonstrates poise, confidence and humor in our conversation. I was so happy that she (and her mom) agreed that Claire should share her story.
Credit for the podcast safe music used in this episode goes to ccMixter. Please feel free to leave comments for Claire. Remember, feedback is a gift.
She Saw Her Sign – Episode 52
Posted on: April 18, 2011
Episode 52 features Marley Robertson, who hails from Winchester, Virginia. Marley is 23 years old and a recent graduate of Old Dominion University, with a degree in Human Services. She is applying to graduate programs for Fall 2011. She wants to pursue a Master’s degree in Divinity.
Marley has always been actively involved with her church, and has currently been working as a Youth Minister.
Listen in as Marley honestly shares her history of covert stuttering. We met on one of the stuttering listservs, where Marley shared that she really wanted to become more open and positive about her stuttering.
Marley shares about her recent therapy experience at the Hollins Communication Research Institute in Roanoke, Virginia, and about the fluency tools she learned there. She also talks about being open and honest about her stuttering with people she has always hid it from.
Marley only recently discovered her “calling” for Ministry and tells us how she knew. She also shares a great story that definitely signaled that she has made the right decisions in her life.
Credit for the podcast safe musical clip “Echoed” goes to ccMixter. Please feel free to leave comments for Marley, or just tell her what a great job she has done. This is the first time Marley has been public with her story.
Congratulations Marley for sharing and inspiring us!
My Greatest Gift – Episode 51
Posted on: April 4, 2011
Episode 51 features Mary Wood, who hails from Fort Wayne, Indiana, via Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. Mary is an ordained Unity Minister. She went back to school at age 66 and was ordained in 2005. Mary recently celebrated her 74th birthday!
I met Mary last year at the NSA Conference in Cleveland. She did a workshop called, “I Need Your Love. Is That True?” I joked with her that it was one of the few workshops with an 8:30am start time that I have actually remembered attending! A friend introduced me to Mary after her workshop.
The theme of the workshop was fear of rejection. We go through life needing people to tell us what a great job we have done, so we can feel worthy, affirmed, loved. But the basis for Mary’s workshop, and her recent life’s work, is that we really only need to believe that about our selves. We don’t need for others to tell us that we are good. Easier said than done!
Listen in as Mary shares some of the compelling questions she has asked herself (and then others) as she learned more and more about the connections to stuttering and self-esteem. She has asked herself, “What is it that I don’t like about stuttering?” She has found it to be that fear of rejection that we all know, even though it may be hard to admit.
We also discuss replacing negative thinking with positive thinking and how stuttering became like a self-fulfilling prophesy for Mary. We talk about involvement in stuttering support, Toastmasters, and how Mary knew that she was supposed to be speaking to people every chance she got.
Credit for the podcast safe musical clip “Echoed” goes to ccMixter. Feel free to leave comments or questions for either Mary or me. Feedback is a gift!
Episode 50 features Jenny who hails from Santa Clarita, California. Jenny and her husband are the proud parents of two boys, Matthew and Nathan, with a third boy arriving in July. Congratulations to all!
Congratulations also to “Women Who Stutter: Our Stories”, for this milestone 50th episode. I am proud to be part of this magical telling of stories that have just been waiting to be heard.
Before becoming a stay-at-home mom, Jenny was pursuing her doctorate in higher education at UCLA. She was researching what impact choosing two year community colleges before transferring into four year schools might have on the typical college student.
Jenny jokes that she had vowed that she would not be one of those women who did not complete her educational goals because of pregnancy, but so far, parenting has kept her busy enough to not finish the PhD yet!
Listen in as we talk about acceptance, guilt and shame, and what it has been like for Jenny’s son Matthew, who is 9 years old and also stutters.
Matthew was having a hard time with bullying and teasing by peers, which ultimately helped Jenny begin to resolve her own acceptance issues with being a woman who stutters.
Jenny found a great speech therapist for Matthew, who has also met two other kids his age who stutter. Jenny herself has recently begun attending the NSA chapter in San Fernando Valley and hopes to attend her first NSA conference herself in 2012.
Credit for the podcast safe music clip used in this episode goes to DanoSongs.
As always, feel free to leave feedback for either Jenny or me. We’d love to hear your thoughts on being a woman who stutters who also has a child who stutters.
The Outer Rim Of A Bowl-Episode 49
Posted on: March 14, 2011
Episode 49 features Hannah Laday, who hails from Central New Jersey. Hannah came out of the woods of rural Maine to attend a stuttering retreat, met and married George, and moved to New Jersey.
Hannah is the leader of the Central New Jersey NSA chapter. We got to know each other through NSA conferences, email, the covert support list and phone chats. Hannah also works as a direct support professional for women with developmental disabilities.
Hannah has had quite the journey. She literally moved out of the woods onto a road and began using a phone after a long time of not doing so. “Bottoming out” finally propelled her to make changes in her life.
She has pushed outside of her comfort zone many times. She “exposed” herself at the NSA Covert panel workshop and contributed a paper about covert stuttering to the 2010 ISAD online conference. Read and learn about “Lightening the Load of Covert Stuttering”.
Listen in to a robust dialogue with plenty of emotion. We talk about how and why we limit ourselves, being in groups but not really part of them, courage and change. The take away from this episode – never, ever think you don’t have a story that needs telling. We all need to be heard. Our stories are powerful!
Credit for the podcast safe musical clip “Echoed” goes to ccMixter. Be sure to leave comments. Feedback is a gift!
I Still Have To Talk – Episode 48
Posted on: March 7, 2011
Episode 48 features Annette, who hails from Victoria, British Columbia, Canada. Annette is 23 years old, and is a Registered Nurse. She graduated from nursing school two years ago and has been practicing for one year.
She has been working in a long-term care home, and as of this publication, will be starting a new position in a rehabilitation hospital. She easily discloses that it’s not always easy being a nurse who stutters, but she knows she is just as competent as any of her co-workers.
Annette explains that she finds it easier to talk with her patients and co-workers than it is with doctors. We explore how very often talking with anybody in a position of authority can be stressful and intimidating. Annette shares that she feels more in control when interacting with her patients.
We talk about how stuttering has impacted relationships with friends and family, and the differences in how her mom and dad have approached it with her. Annette also shares her experiences with speech therapy and what has been most helpful for her.
The biggest insight for Annette has been overcoming fear, gaining confidence and being open. And that comes through loud and clear in this conversation. Give it up for a strong, independent young woman doing exactly what she wants to do. You go girl. That’s what it is all about!
Credit for the podcast safe music used in this episode goes to ccMixter. Feel free to leave comments for Annette or just let her know how cool she is!
Standing Up – Episode 47
Posted on: February 24, 2011
Episode 47 features Nina G, the Bay Area’s Only Stuttering Stand-Up Comic. Nina is a return guest. We first met Nina and heard her story in Episode 17, back in early August 2010. At that time, Nina talked about how she always wanted to get into comedy and what finally prompted her to take the plunge.
In today’s episode, Nina shares how it feels to be approaching her one-year anniversary as a comic and what the experience has really been like. She also shares the significance of how performing stand-up on stage allows her to perfect real “standing up” for herself.
We also discuss how important validation is, the importance of laughter and giving people permission to laugh, and how comedy has brought Nina much closer to authenticity, which is what we all strive for.
Nina also shares what the reactions have been to her comedy, from her stuttering peers, her family and mainstream audiences. And we talk about how stuttering more, and in comedy, has crossed over into other areas of her life.
Listen in to this great episode and hear how stand-up comedy from a person who stutters really does mean “standing up”. I must get to the San Francisco area one day to see Nina G perform on stage. She has offered me a “standing” invitation. Please be sure to leave comments or questions for Nina, and me too, if you wish!
Credit for the podcast safe music used in this episode goes to DanoSongs
Also, if you have not seen a clip of Nina, please be sure to check this out. Nina G – a stand up woman standing up for all of us.
Episode 46 features Kay, who hails from West Africa. Kay is a lawyer currently working as counsel for a litigation firm. Kay spent many of her childhood years in France. French is her mother tongue.
We spoke with each other via Skype in early February, when Kay was in the US at the University of Minnesota. As of the posting of this episode, she is now back in West Africa.
We first met on the Covert-s email support group, where Kay was posting a lot and asking questions. I took a chance and emailed her off list. We got to know each other a bit and Kay quickly agreed to share her story to help others.
Kay shares some very personal glimpses into her life, including the effects of some early abuse. She also shares how she chose to become a lawyer, and how very hard it was for her due to her stuttering. She had grave doubts about her abilities to appear competent as a lawyer and worried how her father, an esteemed public figure and lawyer in West Africa, would perceive her.
Kay is gut-wrenchingly honest about disappointing her father and buckling under the pressure of the legal profession and communicating in courts and trials.
We discuss not only covert stuttering, but also the notion of the need to be covert for professional reasons, for self-preservation and protection. We also discuss how Kay never talked about stuttering with anyone until 6 months ago when she entered into some therapy here in the US.
She was always concerned with making her parents, friends and colleagues comfortable around her, and she tried hard to not have to subject them to listening to her stutter. She never let on how anxious and fearful she was, always putting other people’s comfort ahead of her own needs.
This was a powerful conversation. There is some background noise I was unable to remove, but the content of Kay story far outweighs any editing issues. Feel free to leave comments for Kay or just simply let her know how much you appreciated hearing her story. Credit for the podcast safe music used in this episode goes to DanoSongs.
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