Posts Tagged ‘workplace stuttering’
Find Your Community – Episode 268
Posted on: June 20, 2024
Episode 268 features Amber Kennedy, who hails from South Lake Tahoe, California, by way of Australia. Amber came to the USA by way of working on private yachts. She and her husband own and manage 10 restaurants around the lake.
We talk about how Amber manages stuttering in a communication heavy industry. She talks about advertising, advocacy and self-disclosure. Amber also shares that one needs to be prepared to have a conversation about stuttering when you self-disclose.
Amber attended her first NSA conference in 2022 and found it to be life changing. She found language and tools she needed to make it easier to talk about stuttering. She also talks about the great experience she has had being a co-leader of the Sacramento, CA chapter with Mike Molino, who Amber shares took her under his wing and helped her acclimate to this part of her stuttering journey.
We also talk about shame, acceptance and the crucial importance of finding community.
Showing Up – Episode 266
Posted on: April 1, 2024
Episode 266 features Jolie Keenan, who is an infectious disease physician who hails from Washington State. She grew up in the Philippines and moved to the USA after completing her medical training. She has two young daughters.
Jolie shares how listening to this podcast helped her get through a lot of dark moments about her stuttering, when she feared she would be judged as “less than” or incompetent. She shares that during residency she felt a lot of pressure to appear fluent. To this day, she does not disclose that she stutters, but rather overprepares for presentations and grand rounds.
She has learned that she does have value to offer the world, and growing more confident leads to her stuttering less. She talks about the importance of building up a bank of positive speaking experiences, to draw upon during the times when she feels embarrassed or looked down upon.
Jolie believes it’s possible to change your thoughts about stuttering, from “I can’t” to “so what, I just stutter.”
A Full Heart – Episode 265
Posted on: March 25, 2024
Episode 265 Features Stacey Dedering, who hails from San Jose, California. Stacey is the proud mom to 17 year old twins and works as a HR Generalist in the education industry. She also volunteers with her local Food Bank, takes leadership roles and will soon celebrate 4 years of volunteerism.
Listen in to a wonderful conversation where we discuss how Stacey has come to love doing presentations after many years of shying away from that. We also talk about whether we consider stuttering to be a disability, accommodations that can be made for stuttering, covert stuttering and the stigma that is still associated with stuttering.
We also talked about the safety created in the monthly “NSA Women Connect” which has become a sacred space exclusively for women who stutter.
Stacey is hoping to attend her first National Stuttering Association conference this summer, and we have already vowed to give each other big bear hugs.
Stutter With Me – Episode 259
Posted on: August 1, 2023
Episode 259 features Haley Totherow, who hails from Benicia, California, in the San Francisco Bay Area. Haley has always had a passion for writing, thinking she could express herself better on paper. However, the stress of job interviews caused her to put her writing dreams on hold and she found herself pursuing other opportunities.
Haley currently works as a production baker, a career jump that prompts her to acknowledge the importance of rolling with the punches.
Listen in as we talk about how an NSA workshop on job interviews really helped her to see stuttering’s strengths. We also talk about small talk, increasing confidence and exploring new parts of her personality.
Haley has an Instagram account, @StutterWithMe, which she hopes to create more content and work on educating others about stuttering. She also has a blog of the same name, which shows off her writing skills.
Thank you Haley for such an inspiring conversation.
Known And Understood – Episode 258
Posted on: July 19, 2023
Episode 258 features Marissa Druzchetta, who hails from Houston, Texas. Marissa is a social worker and presently works as a Director of a Meals-on-Wheels program. She supervises around 10 staff and 100 volunteers, so she describes her work environment as very fast paced and not always conducive to disclosure.
Marissa is also very involved in the stuttering community and the NSA, currently serving as Chapter Leader for the NSA Houston Adult chapter. This chapter is the second longest established chapter and several of the early founders and leaders of the group are still actively engaged.
Listen in as we discuss the importance of finding community, the importance of self care and showing up and being there for others. Marissa also shares a great piece of advice for any of us to take to heart. Say this out loud a few times: “Don’t let the Perfect be the enemy of the Good.” We are good enough!
Episode 256 features Mide Oyindamola, PharmD, RPH, who hails from Palestine, Texas, by way of South Carolina and Nigeria. Mide works as a hospital pharmacist.
Listen in as we discuss how Mide came to choose pharmacy as her career. We also discuss covert stuttering, and what happened when Mide lost the ability to be covert.
She says it felt like a midlife crisis, even though she was only in her 20’s. Her stuttering frequency and severity increased seemingly overnight, and she also felt like she had “started to stutter for the first time.”
We talk about her positive therapy experience and finding support through the National Stuttering Association. And we wrap up with discussing how being vulnerable invites others to do the same, which helps build relationships.
Listen for how the title of this episode was chosen!
Episode 254 features Dr. Tracey Wallace, who hails from Brandywine, Maryland. Tracey is an educational audiologist for the Washington, DC public schools. She also works with her husband as an entrepreneur, with an event venue that they are growing.
Tracey spent more than half of her life managing the stress of trying to survive as a covert stutterer. She describes walking into stuttering moments, panicking, and falling apart.
One such moment led to a “rock bottom” experience as an audiologist. That lead to her finding and attending her first NSA chapter meeting (then known as the NSP) and later meeting a SLP who offered a non-traditional form of speech therapy, known as avoidance reduction. Listen as Tracey describes how this changed her life.
We also discuss stuttering and deafness, ASL, the costs of concealment, and “false fluency.”
Thank you Tracey for such a meaningful conversation.
Episode 251 features Emma MacMillan, who hails from Minneapolis, Minnesota. Emma works at a bank as a relationship manager, working with the mergers and acquisitions team. She enjoys reading, concerts and hanging out with friends.
Emma opens up about working with fast paced attorneys, who slow down to listen to her. She had challenged herself with customer service jobs in high school and college to get more comfortable with stuttering at work, and where she increased her confidence.
We also discuss how persons who stutter are represented in the media, educating others, her experience of being an “outgoing introvert” and how women are unicorns in the stuttering community.
Emma attended her first NSA conference this summer and we spend time talking about her experiences, how it felt meeting others who stutter, and some of the workshops that really made an impact.
Thank you Emma for such an inspiring conversation.
What Makes Us Relevant?
Posted on: April 5, 2022
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I haven’t written in a while as I’ve been grappling with big issues. Anxiety and depression, talking less often to people, feeling isolated, fun stuff like that.
But my mind keeps wandering to relevance. I worry that I am not relevant to, well, anyone. I don’t work, and I don’t have regular social interaction, unless you count the “thank you” at the grocery store. I felt relevant and productive when I worked, both with colleagues and clients.
So I’ve been stewing over why I don’t feel relevant. And have been thinking a lot of about with who do we need to be relevant to, in order to feel relevant. Is it engagement with others that makes me/us feel relevant, is it doing something for someone else, or is it just about being relevant to myself?
It’s so easy to let negative self-talk and self loathing consume our thoughts, as I did for so long because of stuttering. I felt like I didn’t measure up, or ever could, to others who did not stutter. Avoidance became a self preserving habit, one that spilled over into other areas of my life. I intentionally chose not to interact with potential friends or many co-workers out of shame and fear of being seen in a negative light. That used to eat me up.
Then I found the stuttering community and dove in and realized instantly that helping others helped me. In little ways: encouraging others, sharing my stories, celebrating triumphs with others who may not even realize what they just did or said was a triumph.
I felt relevant in that world. I took on volunteer opportunities, led groups, presented workshops and generally felt good. I felt I was making a difference. I felt relevant.
But it seems now that everything has changed. I’ve had major life changes that have been difficult. I stepped down from the NSA Board of Directors because I thought my messy life would adversely affect my ability to help others and be a leader. I also worried that financially I could not contribute and of course afford to pay my way to conferences. At times, I feel extremely irrelevant in the stuttering community, which is funny, because it was deep involvement that helped me so much and made me see, really see, that I could help others.
I guess it’s most important to feel relevant to yourself. Find ways to be relevant. I’ve been trying to do that, from afar, on Zoom, like most of us have become so used to. I try to talk to people as often as I can, but honestly, that’s an effort, just like getting out of bed on some days.
But that’s OK. Being messy and unsure is what makes us human. I remind myself of that often. Helping others to realize that being messy, including not taking a shower every day or hardly making the bed, is relevant because I know others can relate to that. We all are messy. And being able to be comfortable with that helps me realize that relevance is a matter of perspective.
Episode 244 features Bhupinder Purewal, who hails from Coventry, England. Bhupinder teaches all subjects in primary school as a supply teacher, the same as a substitute teacher. Her students range in age from 5 – 11 years old. Bhupinder finds children are more accepting and curious about stammering than are adults, even when some of the students are “naughty.” Children have not been tainted by prejudice yet.
Working in a different school every day comes with some anxiety. She describes it as being scary, and finds her heart pounding on the way to school. She worries about how the day will go, and then realizes why does she fret like that, as the day always goes fine.
Listen in as we talk about disclosure, teacher training and the implied assumption that maybe she was not well suited for teaching, and the challenges of small talk.
We also talk about speech therapy experiences, and trying hypnotherapy and singing lessons. We wrap up by talking about how empowering it was for her to find stammering support and the founding of Coventry Stammerers, which meets every two weeks. Meeting other people who stammer validates our experiences.
Don’t miss this episode. Bhupinder is a very inspiring young woman.
Little Bit Bolder – Episode 238
Posted on: August 12, 2021
Episode 238 features Lisa Nguyen, who hails from Raleigh, North Carolina. Lisa works in home health care, and plans to start a graduate certificate degree in Health Administration Management. Her career goal is to help improve the efficiency of our health care system and contribute to lowering the costs of health care.
Lisa spent time as a hospice volunteer. She enjoys hearing about the personal experiences and life stories of older people. She says she’ll encourage those adults who are able, to do life reviews. For those who cannot, Lisa is happy to be there and hold their hand.
Lisa is also co-chapter leader of the adult National Stuttering Association (NSA) support group chapter in Raleigh. Her SLP and NSA chapter leader was impressed with the work Lisa had done over the years with her stuttering and felt Lisa was ready for a leadership role. Lisa has taken to it like a fish out of water.
Listen in as we discuss presence, moving forward and disclosure. It’s clear that Lisa also has the skill of “listening in all the right places.”
Episode 226 features Stephanie Nicolai, who hails from San Diego, CA, and presently lives in Peoria, Arizona. Stephanie is married and a mom to a 2 and 1/2 year old son, and works full time as a psychologist.
I wondered why Stephanie chose a profession where she literally talks all day. She explains taking a psychology course while still in high school and wound up loving it. She says she is passionate about human behavior. Stephanie also mentions the natural empathy she can pour into other people.
Listen in as we talk about stuttering trauma and how humans have more in common with each other than they think they do.
We also talk about how the National Stuttering Association was a game changer for both her and her parents. Stephanie’s first NSA experience was at a “Family Fun Day.” it was there that Stephanie first heard other people stuttering and then she and her parents were hooked. Stephanie describes her parents as very supportive and involved in the NSA. Her mom started NSA chapters for kids and teens, and both parents can be seen in some volunteer capacity at annual conferences.
We also discuss the unique, fun opportunity Stephanie had when she auditioned and landed a spot on the TV show “Wheel of Fortune.” Stephanie’s episode aired recently. We’ll let you listen in to hear how she fared on the show.
We marveled how a person who stutters can do anything, including appearing on a national TV show and do well. She says, “we are our own worst enemies.”
Go for what you want – don’t let stuttering stop you. Lemonade sure tastes good.
Stuttering In Spanish
Posted on: November 2, 2020
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I had an amazing opportunity last week to be a guest panelist for an event hosted by the Peruvian Stuttering Association. For International Stuttering Awareness Day, they held a week long festival for all things stuttering. I thought that was so wonderful, to intentionally raise awareness of stuttering for an extended period of time.
The organizer invited me to participate in a panel session on Friday October 23, from 7-9pm. I started off a bit intimidated, as I was the only woman who stuttered on the panel, and the only one who did not speak Spanish. It felt so weird. I had a translator assigned to me and when I realized he knew his stuff, I relaxed and began to enjoy the experience.
The first part of the panel was for each of us to give a brief overview of our country’s stuttering association. I spoke about the mission and vision of the National Stuttering Association. I spoke 4 or 5 sentences at a time and the translator repeated what I said back to the audience in Spanish. Then the other two panelists, from Argentina and Columbia, gave their overviews in Spanish and the translator typed in the Zoom chat box what was being said.
The second part of the panel was a 90 minute Q&A with audience members, who asked questions in Spanish on the live feed as the whole event was held on Zoom and then streamed through Facebook Live. I did not know that it was going to be live streamed until about 30 minutes ahead of the event.
I had the rare opportunity to possibly feel like the lone person who stutters in a large room of many fluent people. I felt alone in a crowded space. I imagine that’s how people who stutter feel until they are welcomed into the space they are in.
And that’s exactly how it played out for me. Once I got over the initial nerves of not knowing the language and realized that my translator wasn’t going to leave me hanging, I actually enjoyed the experience.
I was able to talk about the NSA’s vast network of support chapters across the USA, and how they are like a lifeline to people who stutter. For many who stutter, attending a local NSA chapter meeting may be their very first introduction to others who stutter and the empowerment felt when around others who stutter.
I was able to talk about how support meetings are facilitated, the role of the chapter leader, inviting everyone to speak and give permission to just listen. When I talked about the importance of honoring silence among people who stutter, I could see that definitely struck a chord with the panelists because they felt when that happened they had failed as group leaders. So we talked about how facilitation is more like guiding a group discussion rather than actually leading and feeling that every space must be filled with words.
I also had the opportunity to talk about inviting women into the stuttering spaces that we create. The South America stuttering leaders really valued that part of the conversation and pledged to explore that further and look at opportunities to find and welcome women who stutter.
We also spent time discussing initiatives to promote better career outcomes for people who stutter in the employment process. I was able to share what the NSA has done with our “We Stutter @ Work” program.
This experience was a major leap away from my comfort zone but as I reflected on it, it was a real honor and privilege to represent women who stutter in a traditionally male oriented space.
I hope to be invited and participate in more of such opportunities.
Nothing To Hide – Episode 222
Posted on: September 24, 2020
Episode 222 features Aisha Haynes, who hails from Columbia, South Carolina. Dr. Aisha Haynes is the Assistant Director for the Center for Teaching Excellence. She teaches two online courses at the university. For fun, Aisha enjoys traveling, trying and eating new food, and adventurous activities.
Aisha had been a covert stutterer for many years. She shares that it’s only been over the last 5 years or so that she has given herself permission to “stutter really well.”
Listen in as we discuss disclosure and advertising, not being able to hide stuttering anymore, and being more comfortable in her stuttering skin. The title of this episode comes from an article that Aisha was featured in at her university, which she describes as her “coming out story.”
Below please find a video of Aisha and colleague Dr. Charley Adams discussing stuttering at the university.
The Value of Vulnerability
Posted on: February 9, 2020
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I had such a wonderful experience this week, presenting to an organization and people I did not know about stuttering at work.
This has been a vision of mine for quite a few years now. If people who stutter are going to be truly supported and included in all aspects of life, we have to educate the people in our worlds that do not stutter.
People who stutter want to be successful in school and at work. So schools, universities and workplaces need to hear stuttering, normalize it and get over the fears associated with hiring people who stutter.
It was a very surreal experience for me – to have traveled down to Northern Virginia to meet with people interested in “hidden disabilities” and stutter openly, without fear or anxiety. People at this workplace truly want to be inclusive of everyone who brings difference and new perspectives. I was welcomed with open arms, and spoke to an audience of about 50, 20 or so in-person and the rest calling in from other company sites via Skype.
The main theme of my presentation is what is gained through being completely open and vulnerable about something that is often widely misunderstood and stigmatized. I spoke of the strengths people who stutter have innately, because of our lived experience with stuttering. We bring grit, perseverance, resilience, patience and empathy to work – all of which are valuable competencies any employer wants.
The best way to make change and help people understand stuttering is so simple: TALK ABOUT IT. Make it less of a mystery, normalize it, frame what is often perceived as a weakness as a great strength.
In so doing, we will help workplaces become more inclusive for today’s workers who stutter and for the young people behind us, who will enter the workforce. Hopefully, my efforts and those of other adults who are not afraid to be vulnerable, will help lessen the stigma and burden of trying to hide stuttering in the workplace.
The company that I presented at recorded my presentation. I am looking forward to seeing that, and more importantly, looking forward to getting more workplaces to see the value of talking about stuttering at work.
It’s freeing and hopeful.
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