Make Room For The Stuttering

Good Confident Stuttering

Posted on: January 5, 2012

My friend Devayan from India made me smile when he asked if I would be able to meet up with him and his brother when they arrive to New York this weekend.

It seems Devayan’s older brother has not been around too much stuttering, other than his brother’s, so Devayan thought it would be a good idea if he met me. As he put it, then his brother would be exposed to some good, confident stuttering.

That made me laugh when we discussed it over Skype this past weekend. We were chatting about Devayan’s pending move from Mumbai, India, to New York, USA. He had lots of questions, including how cold is it here, where could he find some inexpensive pots and pans, and does the local grocery store sell good chicken and eggs?

During our conversation, Devayan had several very good stuttering moments! It seems excitement and stress increases his stuttering, just like it does for most of us. (I had been under the impression that Indians who stutter don’t get stressed! Only kidding!)

So when he asked if I could meet them on Sunday for coffee before his brother returns home, I smiled and laughed. Devayan considers my stuttering to be of the good and confident type.

It struck me how great it was that we were able to have this conversation about stuttering – him telling me mine is confident and me telling him that he had some “great stutters.”

It also made me ask myself: “what is confident stuttering?” And it made me think he is well en route to becoming a good future speech therapist!

Confident stuttering is natural and open, staying with the block or repetition, making eye contact and smiling during the stuttering moments. I will be the first to admit that I don’t always do this, but I strive to anyway!

Maybe your definition is different! What do you think? How do you define “good confident stuttering?”

P.S. Devayan arrives in New York this weekend, and I am confident that we will both be cold and stutter well when we finally meet in person!

3 Responses to "Good Confident Stuttering"

That sounds like a wonderful definition. I would add forgetting that you are stuttering because your stuttering confidence is so automatic that it feels natural to yourself and the listener. And how lucky are we as pws to have so much family from around the world?

How about not attaching the confidence to stuttering, but attach it to the person behind the stuttering. I believe all positive focus should be on the person who happens to stutter and not on the stutter itself. We tend to get caught up in the actual stutter and the act of stuttering and forget that there is a real emotional human being behind the stuttering. With this mindset change we can all become confident people.

Agreed! But as we both know, there are so many people who are so shamed by their stuttering that they hide and limit themselves. That was me for a long time until I had my “Aha” moment. Thanks for sharing – we are people first!

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