Posts Tagged ‘stuttering’
What Goes Unsaid
Posted on: August 30, 2025
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“When I am silent, I have thunder hidden inside.” ~ Rumi
This quote really resonates with me about stuttering. Sometimes I don’t say things because I worry the words won’t come out the way I intended.
I have always found it curious that stuttering can create such intimacy in conversation, if we allow ourselves to stutter openly and naturally.
Stuttering is not just what we hear. It’s also about what we don’t hear.
When we block, with no audible sound or word coming out, something is still being said. There is a connection, as we, myself and my listener, wait for my words, if the listener chooses to wait.
We should choose people who choose us. That is how intimate and meaningful conversations happen – when we choose and make time and space to listen deeply, regardless of how we sound or how long it may take.
I have spent a lot of time recently reflecting upon and sharing my stuttering journey and how I’ve arrived at the very good place I find myself today.
It has not been an easy path – it’s been filled with trauma, challenge and often a great sense of helplessness. I have always been somewhat of a perfectionist and I’ve tried to control the things in life that I could as stuttering is one of those things that I could not.
I don’t think I am a better listener because I stutter. Rather, I listen more deeply to stuttered speech and that includes stuttering that has no sound.
So much is said and shared in silence and we who stutter GET the opportunity to learn from silence and be patient and curious. How wonderful that is, to get opportunities like this.
Too often in our fast paced world, people rush to fill any moment of silence (however brief) because those moments can be uncomfortable and awkward. But allowing silence and giving space to reflect and process is the beauty of communication. There are challenges and opportunities. We can choose to stutter well. We can choose to struggle well.
When people who stutter feel safe with each other to wait with curiosity and process what has been said or not said, that is a beautiful and intimate connection.
When I am silent, there’s a lot of thunder inside, often bursting to come out. But at this very good point in my journey, I am comfortable with silence and the very deep connections that shared silence can foster.
Roll With It – Episode 273
Posted on: April 21, 2025
Episode 273 features Halie Matthews, who hails from South East Georgia. She is a toddler teacher and works with 2 and 3 year old’s in a pre-school. She is also in the process of getting her degree in Early Childhood Education.
Listen in as we discuss what it’s like working with young kids and their interest in her stutter. She usually refers to it as “silly speech day” with the kids, and sometimes they will help her with a word.
We also talk about how during speech therapy, Halie’s SLP would pull up an episode of this podcast to listen to, which helped Halie so much toward acceptance. This made me feel so good as the host of this podcast that it was used and found helpful by a SLP.
Halie reports that it helped her to remove the pressure to be fluent, which actually helped her become more fluent.
What a great conversation!
And The Beat Goes On – Episode 272
Posted on: April 7, 2025
Episode 272 features Gina Waggott who hails from Yorkshire, England. She is a writer and owns her own internet advertising business. She is working on a book honoring long time friend and idol Scatman John, or John Larkin, his given name.
John stuttered and hugely influenced Gina when she was a teen and going through turbulent times with her own stuttering.
We discuss all things stuttering, especially covert stuttering. Gina shares that she worked in television, particularly the BBC, for 10 years. But she found it stressful and she wanted to see the world. We also discuss speech therapy, which was essentially “treat the stutter, hide the rest” which is so difficult for covert stutterers and was an experience that we both shared.
When Gina was a teen, she heard one of Scatman John’s songs about stuttering and was intrigued enough to reach out. She wrote him a letter, which she describes as a cry for help. She was stunned when he responded. He gave her one of the most important pieces of advice – find the stuttering self help community. She did and it changed her life. As did knowing John Larkin. Be sure to listen to the compelling details of her friendship with John.
The book she is writing will be a tribute/manual on how to be an awesome human being while stuttering. The actual title will be “Scatman John – The Remarkable Story of the World’s Most Unlikeliest Pop Star.”
This was such an impactful conversation, and one that we both wondered why the heck it took so long for us to have. I look forward to meeting Gina in person one day.
Episode 271 features Paula Campbell-Schwab, who hails from Houston, Texas. Paula is a retired Special Education teacher and spends her time doing lots of fun things, such as yoga, water aerobics, and Tai Chi. At 72 years young, Paula is a force to be reckoned with.
Paula grew up in the Northeast, and lived in nine different states, before moving to Houston. She has been very active in the National Stuttering Association and in 1985, she helped co-found the NSA Houston Chapter. Fast forward to 2024, Paula was inducted into the NSA Hall of Fame. She said she found it so surreal, and tried to concentrate on all the others at the conference while on stage accepting her award.
Paula shared that a friend recorded her acceptance speech and she hasn’t watched it yet. Paula doesn’t like seeing herself stutter on screen, can be highly self-critical, and described years of wanting to be invisible, wanting to blend in, feeling like she didn’t have a voice. She goes on to share that now that she has found her voice, she likes “Authentic Paula” who is more “Real” than the Paula she knew growing up.
Listen in as Paula talks about why she chose teaching, learned ASL, how stuttering runs in her family, and what brings her back every year to the NSA.
Paula was very touched by a book written by mutual friend Hanan Hurwitz titled Stuttering: From Shame and Anxiety to Confident Authenticity. She brought copies of the book and gave one to every member of the Houston Chapter and arranged to have Hanan join a meeting and have an open discussion about the book and its meaning to members.
If you don’t know Paula, make it your business to get to know her. She is a treasure.
Our Voices Matter
Posted on: November 17, 2024
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I recently had the great pleasure of attending the Canadian Stuttering Association annual conference for the first time last week. The conference was held in Montreal, Quebec and was less than a four hour drive for a friend and I so that clinched our decision to attend.
It was a joint conference with the ABC (Association begaiment communication) which is the French speaking arm of the Canadian stuttering associations. It meant that there were workshops in both English and French, which was richly inclusive to all.
I loved the conference. There was a total of 150 people, which opened the door to get to know people better than in situations where there are large groups of people.
The Workshops were fantastic, something for everyone, and anytime we were together as a group, announcements were made both in English and French.
I did a workshop on recovering from the shame many of us deal with stuttering, which turned into a great discussion about what if you’ve never been able to let go of shame. What if shame consumes your every moment?
My friend Nicole did a workshop on stuttering and grief, which gave people a different perspective to look at stuttering. She encouraged us to look at how we felt about perhaps having given up some of our dreams when we realized that stuttering made us better at some things than others.
I met a lot of first time attendees and thought what a great experience to step into the stuttering community in a smaller setting. Many first timers came up and spoke at the final open mic session.
The CSA’s motto is “Our Voices Matter” and I came away from the conference experience definitely feeling like that. Plus, it didn’t hurt that I saw friends that I hadn’t seen in quite a few years.
This was my first international conference and I am so glad I went.
The Power Of Listening
Posted on: September 29, 2024
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Each year, a small group of people undertake the task of keeping an online conference together for the entire month of October. Judy Kuster started the first online ISAD conference in 1998 and kept it running through 2012. From 2013 onward, different people devote their time to keep the conference alive and vibrant.
This year’s theme is something we haven’t tackled yet – listening. Listening is 90% of effective communication, yet for many people who stutter, we’ve been poor listeners. We’ve often spent too much head space thinking of what words we could say without stuttering and then we’d lose the gist of the conversation. Has that ever happened to you?
Check out the contributions to this years conference and see what many people think about listening.
You’re Worth It – Episode 270
Posted on: September 13, 2024
Episode 270 features Chyncia Smith, who hails from New Jersey. She works in outdoor retail, and also coaches field hockey and softball.
Chyncia studied accounting in college, and we talk about whether that was an intentional career choice based on perceived communication demands. In her present role, Chyncia shares that she always tries to stay focused on customer goals vs. worrying about self and possible judgment.
We also talk about covert stuttering. Chyncia shares that she carried a lot of weight around in her efforts to “try not to stutter.” A lot of that changed as an adult when she finally found a SLP that told her it was OK to stutter.
Chyncia found the National Stuttering Association (NSA) in 2021 and has benefitted greatly from the sense of community she finally found. I met Chyncia in person at this year’s NSA conference, and I shared that I loved the workshop she facilitated on “How We Listen.”
Chyncia shares an inspiring message that is important for all of us. “I cannot focus on me and give space to you at the same time.”
Episode 269 features Brittney O’Neal who hails from Sacramento, California. Brittney is busy with a wife and almost 3 year old daughter and her career. Brittney is a Certified Prosthetist/Orthotist and is preparing to soon open her own clinic.
In her work, Brittney makes artificial limbs and custom braces. She combines her lifelong passion for building things and helping people.
She stuttered covertly for a long and did not meet another person who stuttered until she was 25 years old. Because she felt alone with her disability, she looked up to those with visible, physical disabilities.
Brittney had plans to enter the Marine Corps and during basic training was told she needed to “fix” herself and she entered into speech therapy for the first time ever. She enrolled into the two-week intensive therapy offered at AIS. She was expecting to learn fluency enhancing strategies and found instead it was all about acceptance. She decided against enrolling in the Marine Corps, as acceptance of stuttering and letting it out opened new doors for her and she couldn’t close that door.
She attended her NSA conference this year. She felt is was so freeing, and she was so happy that she gave herself that time and space.
Listen in to this great conversation and learn how Brittney wants to be a good role model for her daughter.
Find Your Community – Episode 268
Posted on: June 20, 2024
Episode 268 features Amber Kennedy, who hails from South Lake Tahoe, California, by way of Australia. Amber came to the USA by way of working on private yachts. She and her husband own and manage 10 restaurants around the lake.
We talk about how Amber manages stuttering in a communication heavy industry. She talks about advertising, advocacy and self-disclosure. Amber also shares that one needs to be prepared to have a conversation about stuttering when you self-disclose.
Amber attended her first NSA conference in 2022 and found it to be life changing. She found language and tools she needed to make it easier to talk about stuttering. She also talks about the great experience she has had being a co-leader of the Sacramento, CA chapter with Mike Molino, who Amber shares took her under his wing and helped her acclimate to this part of her stuttering journey.
We also talk about shame, acceptance and the crucial importance of finding community.
Never Say Never – Episode 267
Posted on: May 21, 2024
Episode 267 features Lexi Hewitt who hails from Exton, Pennsylvania. Lexi just graduated with a Masters degree in school counseling and is looking forward to working with elementary school students one day.
She is active with the National Stuttering Association (NSA) as a family chapter leader and was a former intern and mentor. Lexi shares that both she and her brother stutter but she was more emotionally affected than he was. They both attended speech therapy as kids.
She looked up information about stuttering in 2019 and learned about the NSA and wound up attending her first conference with her mom and even did a workshop for kids, as a first timer.
As a school counselor, Lexi wants to create a safe space for ALL kids to share anything. Her final words: “Don’t be afraid to face challenges. Make room for all of the feelings.”
Showing Up – Episode 266
Posted on: April 1, 2024
Episode 266 features Jolie Keenan, who is an infectious disease physician who hails from Washington State. She grew up in the Philippines and moved to the USA after completing her medical training. She has two young daughters.
Jolie shares how listening to this podcast helped her get through a lot of dark moments about her stuttering, when she feared she would be judged as “less than” or incompetent. She shares that during residency she felt a lot of pressure to appear fluent. To this day, she does not disclose that she stutters, but rather overprepares for presentations and grand rounds.
She has learned that she does have value to offer the world, and growing more confident leads to her stuttering less. She talks about the importance of building up a bank of positive speaking experiences, to draw upon during the times when she feels embarrassed or looked down upon.
Jolie believes it’s possible to change your thoughts about stuttering, from “I can’t” to “so what, I just stutter.”
A Full Heart – Episode 265
Posted on: March 25, 2024
Episode 265 Features Stacey Dedering, who hails from San Jose, California. Stacey is the proud mom to 17 year old twins and works as a HR Generalist in the education industry. She also volunteers with her local Food Bank, takes leadership roles and will soon celebrate 4 years of volunteerism.
Listen in to a wonderful conversation where we discuss how Stacey has come to love doing presentations after many years of shying away from that. We also talk about whether we consider stuttering to be a disability, accommodations that can be made for stuttering, covert stuttering and the stigma that is still associated with stuttering.
We also talked about the safety created in the monthly “NSA Women Connect” which has become a sacred space exclusively for women who stutter.
Stacey is hoping to attend her first National Stuttering Association conference this summer, and we have already vowed to give each other big bear hugs.
Talk More – Episode 264
Posted on: February 1, 2024
Episode 264 features Elizabeth Edwards, who hails from Baltimore, Maryland. Elizabeth works in Public Health as an Adult Immunization Coordinator.
Elizabeth shares that she attended an Older Adults workshop at the annual NSA conference in 2022 and found that she really wanted to develop and sustain intergenerational relationships. She is now part of the NSA Older Adults committee, as the youth liaison.
Listen in as we discuss “mending the generation gap,” the importance of meaningful connections and stuttering in her own family. Elizabeth’s brother stutters but the two never talked about it until college. She is hopeful that 2024 is the year that her brother will attend a NSA conference.
Life Is A Cabaret – Episode 263
Posted on: November 16, 2023
Episode 263 features Michelle Polinsky, who hails from New York, NY. Michelle works as an ENT surgery coordinator, where she works with a lot of anxious parents. This job sort of fell into her lap, and has actually helped with her speech, as it’s helped her deal with her fear of phone calls.
Michelle studied theater in college, and before the pandemic, started taking cabaret classes. She took a class again after the pandemic and was encouraged to do a show of her own. She has now performed it twice. She couldn’t find a song that represented stuttering, so she wrote one herself. She has been encouraged to submit it for the Cabaret Awards.
Michelle is involved in the stuttering community, as a long time member of the Manhattan chapter of the National Stuttering Association and as a former member of Our Time Theater (now known as SAY.) In fact, Michelle was one of the original pre-teen members of Our Time, and attended a couple of NSA conferences where they performed at the NSA Opening Ceremonies.
Michelle shares that stuttering isn’t the worst thing in the world and that she has a relationship with stuttering that includes community and friends she loves. She treasures her time with “her people” a couple of days a year at the conferences.
And I treasured this conversation. Dear listeners, please take a moment to watch and listen to Michelle’s wonderful original song, in her YouTube video.
Make Room For The Stuttering 
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