Make Room For The Stuttering

Making Listeners Comfortable

Posted on: November 4, 2013

As people who stutter, we often worry about how listeners will react to us when we are stuttering. Are they going to hang in there with us? Will they maintain eye contact?

Or will they get “the look” and avert their eyes and look anywhere but at us? Or will they become impatient and finish our words or sentences for us?

There was an interesting thread about this on Facebook, where a group member asked what we as stutterers should do to make our stuttering more acceptable to listeners.

The response was mixed – with many weighing in that it is not our responsibility to alter our stuttering in some way to make it easier for a listener.

I happen to agree with that! We stutter – most of us have lived with stuttering our whole lives, since we began talking. It can be very difficult for us – shameful and embarrassing. Why should we add to the mix by also assuming the responsibility of how a listener might feel?

In this day and age, with so much diversity, a listener should listen to us exactly the same as they would to anyone else. With respect and patience.

It might make it easier to disclose or advertise that we stutter, but that generally is for our own sake, to lessen our own anxiety. When we do that with confidence, it often provides a cue for the listener to react in kind.

But we should do that for ourselves – not the listener. That’s not our responsibility.

What do you think?

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2 Responses to "Making Listeners Comfortable"

I totally agree with you guys and I even go one step further. I tell the listener why I advertised and throw in voluntary stuttering to help myself. Whats even more rewarding to me is when I have another person who stutters with me that is uncomfortable advertising to see how awesome it works hoping they will do the same one day. I totally love helping others.
Bob Koste

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© Pamela A Mertz and Make Room For The Stuttering, 2009 - 2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Pamela A Mertz and Make Room For The Stuttering with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. Same protection applies to the podcasts linked to this blog, "Women Who Stutter: Our Stories" and "He Stutters: She Asks Him." Please give credit to owner/author Pamela A Mertz 2017.