Posted June 4, 2013on:
I had one of those intimate stuttering moments today. You probably know what I mean.
I got caught in a block on the “k” in the word “keep” – came out something like “ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-kiiiiii-eep.”
I say intimate in that I was looking at the person I was talking to as I blocked and we maintained eye contact through the block.
Neither of us averted our gaze. Our eyes just kind of locked, until I was able to finish the word and then move on. I then glanced away for a second and then glanced back, which I think is normal eye contact. The other person did too.
So why is this a big deal?
Well, stuttering can be very intimate. In a Google+ hangout recently, David, a co-founder of Stutter Social, discussed his view of the “intimacy of stuttering.” It’s my view too.
Getting locked up in a block for a few seconds and sharing that with another person is very personal. I showed my “imperfection” in a vulnerable way.
And to have the other person share that with you, as in maintaining eye contact, until the block is over, is extremely personal.
I appreciated this person’s willingness to stay present with me, as she could have easily averted her eyes out of embarrassment or discomfort. Or even to give me a moment to “collect myself.”
Staying with me in the moment was also a deep sign of respect.
We shared that very personal moment that was important enough to me to write about this today.
What do you think? Can you relate?