Make Room For The Stuttering

I Want To Waltz, Not Tango

Posted on: January 21, 2010

I started writing this post a while ago. It may have been while watching “Dancing With The Stars”. I heard this phrase somewhere or made some connection with the differences in dance styles. My life was starting to feel too much like a tango for a while – tense, terse, tight. Everything. My schedule, my reactions, my speech, my relationship, just everything. I didn’t realize for a long time that I simply wanted to waltz – slowly, smoothly, simply, and enjoy the music and the dance at the same time.

I never learned to dance. I always feel awkward at a wedding or a party. I don’t dance, for fear of looking silly or vulnerable. But I know now that I have really wanted to dance gracefully through my life, and I think I am finally doing it.

My life changed completely when I let my stuttering out and began to openly acknowledge and accept. I just didn’t realize it right away. That was the window opening, and now the door has opened as well. I am finally doing things I want to do, and not feeling guilty. I am getting pleasure out of simple things, and realizing how nice that really is.

I didn’t even realize I was doing the tango all the time. Now that I am waltzing, I can feel the difference. I feel free and relaxed. Happier. I still don’t know exactly what I want, but I sure am enjoying figuring things out.

Waltzing is far easier on the feet and soul and heart. I don’t have to waltz perfectly, I can just sort of sway to life’s  music and enjoy it. Waltz or tango? I think it has a lot to do with acceptance. The more I accept my self for who I am, the more I am willing to take chances.

Yeah, I like waltzing. It seems much more peaceful.

Speaking of peace, my dove of peace looks really good now. All healed. Kind of a signal. That I am finally finding peace. And as a reminder it sits on my shoulder.

Which would you rather do? Waltz or tango? Both forms of dance have their benefits, and maybe a place in our lives. Right? I just happen to want to waltz at this time in my life.

2 Responses to "I Want To Waltz, Not Tango"

Walzing, with just enough tango for a challenge. I’m feeling not quite enough challenge at the moment, and the self-imposed challenges don’t keep my interest. (Such as the housework list I prepare each week, or the novel draft I re-read last fall, or shorthand practice. I’m meeting my goal for singing practice, but partly because the lessons are a treat I give myself, but I feel I need to earn them — much the way I’d make the kids earn a pet or lessons of their own.

I would certainly love to waltz at times, but tangoing has become the norm for me.

Even if I wake up feeling that I think I can waltz today, the tango creeps in.

Congrats you are finally able to waltz, at this time of your life. You are surely a trooper.

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© Pamela A Mertz and Make Room For The Stuttering, 2009 - 2022. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Pamela A Mertz and Make Room For The Stuttering with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. Same protection applies to the podcasts linked to this blog, "Women Who Stutter: Our Stories" and "He Stutters: She Asks Him." Please give credit to owner/author Pamela A Mertz 2022.
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