Make Room For The Stuttering

An Inquiring Mind

Posted on: March 25, 2009

So it seems I have an insatiable appetite for all things stuttering. I can’t help it. I really enjoy hearing about other people’s experiences. Even men. I don’t say that to be sexist in any way. But it seems men relate to their stuttering in a different way than women. Okay, this woman, to be exact. Let me explain.

I attend a self-help support group every Monday night. I enjoy it. Hanging out with people who stutter is cool. I happen to be the only woman in the group right now, and sometimes I am out-numbered 15 to 1. (Some of the men have been asking me if I know where all the women are, as I have not always been the only one. They think they have done something to drive the other women away). I can handle myself just fine with all of these men, thank you very much.

I try to relate to my stuttering as if it is an entity deserving of a relationship. Now maybe this is a bit much, but its where I happen to be right now on my journey. The guys, on the other hand, (not all, but most) don’t seem to relate to even being on a journey. Some instead express frustration that they are not fluent enough or their targets or something else are not working.

I hate targets. I can’t seem to fit them into my life. I understand the usefulness of having a strategy to use when I feel really stuck, but I rarely find myself thinking about taking a full breath or initiating light contact. It seems my mind is always racing far too fast about something else to take the time to think about targets, let alone use them.

So, my inquiring mind wants to know – do women who stutter relate to their stuttering differently than men who stutter? I think so. I definitely do. There is nothing wrong with wanting to have a relationship with my stuttering. I think I’ll even give my stuttering a name. My inquiring mind will have to give it a lot of thought, however. It can’t just be any name. It has to fit me, and my stuttering!

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© Pamela A Mertz and Make Room For The Stuttering, 2009 - 2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Pamela A Mertz and Make Room For The Stuttering with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. Same protection applies to the podcasts linked to this blog, "Women Who Stutter: Our Stories" and "He Stutters: She Asks Him." Please give credit to owner/author Pamela A Mertz 2017.