Every single one of us who stutters has a different experience and different perspective on our stuttering. But I think it is safe to say that we all agree that it can often feel like we live in an impatient world. Just the way we communicate is fast paced and hurried. Sometimes it seems that people really only go through the motions, that we don’t really listen well to each other. It is often a challenge to stay present and engaged with people when our minds are racing with so many things.

As a person who stutters, I know this well. I used to be very dis-engaged when speaking with someone, because I was so focused on rehearsing what I was going to say next or obsessing about which words I should use, to avoid stuttering. I like to think I don’t do this as much anymore.

I have become comfortable enough to do self-advertising of my stutter. Sometimes I will ask the listener to be patient, but usually I don’t have to do that. Just disclosing and “demonstrating” my stuttering is generally enough to lay the ground work for great communication to occur.

Bu this is not always the case. I visited good friend Jamie this weekend, and was able to get greater perspective from someone who stutters very differently than me. Jamie has long, sometimes very tense blocks. She shared with me that she sometimes has trouble contributing to conversations, as she finds it hard to “jump in.” She has talked about her stuttering and asked people to be patient with her. The saying that “patience is a virtue” is very true when applied to engaging with people who stutter.

Anyway, a special moment occurred when Jamie and I went out to a local ice cream joint. I had brought my camcorder (of course) and we recorded my observation of Jamie’s interaction with a young person who took her order at the ice cream stand. Definitely gave me pause to think. About patience, and saying thank you, and those teachable moments.

So take a look! This is not the best quality video – as we recorded outside at night, but it lends authenticity to the moment. And I myself was stuttering particularly WELL. Which goes to show my own increased comfort with my own overt, evolving stuttering.

What do you think about patience? Do you even think about it?