Posts Tagged ‘women who stutter’
No Excuses! – Episode 39
Posted on: January 4, 2011
Episode 39 features Beata Akerman, who hails from Ljubljana, Slovenija (Central Europe). She is a researcher/assistant lecturer in the Faculty of Social Work at the University of Ljubljana. We first met on Facebook, and then enjoyed a video skype chat!
She completed her Masters thesis on changing public discourse on people who stammer in Slovenija. For her doctoral dissertation, she plans to research employment and educational opportunities for people who stammer.
Beata has stuttered since she was 4 years old, and suffered great humiliation as a child and young adult. She was often the brunt of cruel jokes and thought to be intellectually deficient because of her stuttering. She has worked hard on personal acceptance and raising awareness of stuttering in her country.
She has written articles, appeared on television and has even written her own children’s book about a fairy princess who stammers (see link below). Beata also started the first support group for people who stammer in Slovenija. She is the group leader and only female member who attends the group, so far.
Listen in as Beata shares her heartfelt, painful and ultimately triumphant journey of shameful stammering to acceptance. She is a woman of courage who is willing to share her story in order to inspire others who stammer in her country, especially women.
Music used in this episode is credited to ccMixter.
This is a pdf version of Izabela – A Fairy Princess Who Stammered translated into English, without the illustrations.
Also, thanks to Sachin of TISA, here is written text of an interview with Beata. She is truly a role model for women who stutter all over the world.
Your comments, questions or feedback are invited. I am sure Beata would love to hear your thoughts on her story.
The People In Our Lives
Posted on: December 22, 2010
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Short and sweet today. I have spent a lot of time reflecting on how rich my life is. And that is because of the many people I share my life with. It is so true what they say that it is not money that measures our riches – but indeed the relationships we build.
My life has been enriched by the people I come into contact with, and I truly feel I am a better person because I let my heart be open to new people and experiences.
Thank you for enriching my life!
Episode 38 features Maria McGrath, who hails from Santa Barbara, California. She was born in Ireland and lived in London for a long time before moving to America just over a year ago. She trained and worked as an accountant, and has recently begun the adventure of bringing the McGuire Programme to the US.
I “met” Maria after reading a wonderful article she wrote, called “My Turn: Stifled by a Stutter”, which was printed in The LA Times. I emailed her my thoughts about her article, and invited her to tell her story here. The health section of the LA Times published her piece in conjunction with the opening of the new movie, “The King’s Speech”. (which has huge potential to increase stuttering awareness all over the world).
Listen in as Maria and I chat about her younger days and some of the purposeful avoidance situations she found herself in. Maria is a great story-teller, as you’ll easily tell. We also talk about confidence, being in control, and moving through fearful situations.
Maria is taking great leaps outside of her comfort zone with her recent work in figuring out ways to advertise the McGuire programme here in the US. Information for the international McGuire programme can be found here.
Maria would be happy to chat with anyone interested in learning more about how the McGuire programme changed her life. She can be reached at (805)727-3734 and her Skype name is mariamcgrath.
Credit for the podcast safe music, Today Then Tomorrow, used in today’s episode goes to DanoSongs.
Feel free to comment or ask questions for Maria in the comment section, and Pam always loves to hear your feedback too!
It’s Showtime – Episode 37
Posted on: December 9, 2010
Episode 37 features Veronica Lynch, who hails from Dublin, Ireland. Veronica and I share a history of being extremely covert, and then making the transition to overt stuttering. We are both contributing members of the Covert-S email group.
Veronica worked for 30 years with the Irish Airports Authority. She has recently retired, with her last position being Insights and Strategy Manager, of which she was very proud. Veronica worked her way up the ranks in her career, starting with a back room job that didn’t require much talking.
Listen in to a powerful conversation about covert stuttering, “the aha moment” and what it is like living a parallel life. Veronica and I have remarkably similar stories about how we arrived at acceptance, and Veronica shares hers in-depth in this episode. She shares about how being covert means often we have to “be on” and “act” like we are on performing on stage all of the time, which coverts know, can be just exhausting.
Veronica also shares about what the journey has been like having a child who stutters, and how helping her daughter is what ultimately helped her. Veronica also touches on the profound notion that “when the student is ready, the teacher will find you.”
Veronica has been very involved with self-help in Ireland, and is an Executive member of the Irish Stammering Association.
Podcast safe music used in this episode is ” Scott Waves to Salty Grace” by J. Lang and is credited to ccMixter.
Can you relate? Feel free to leave comments or questions for Veronica or just let her know what a great job she did!
Episode 36 features Claudia Diamond, who hails from Guilderland, NY. She works as a medical assistant. A friend of mine from Toastmasters indicated that he knew someone who I should meet. I took a chance and emailed her, we met and have become friends. Both of us enjoy meeting up at our monthly Chat and Chew Too group, which is a social gathering for people who stutter.
Claudia shares her very personal story about her parents that were Holocaust survivors, and the parallels she found with her stuttering journey. Claudia is very candid talking about shame, grief and guilt.
Listen in to a powerful conversation about liberation on many levels. Claudia shares about her childhood, being second generation survivors and dealing with depression. She also shares how it feels to be invisible and how she only lets her “real self” out with people who she is really comfortable with. Claudia also mentions how for women it sometimes feels as if we never really leave junior high!
We also talk about self-help and the NSA, letting go of our past and moving forward, and the importance of humor. Claudia talks about a special collection she has and her “wall of fame” in her kitchen.
Credit for the podcast music used in this episode goes to ccMixter.
Please feel free to leave comments or feedback for Claudia or just tell her what a great job she did.
It’s A Thing I Do – Episode 35
Posted on: November 19, 2010
Episode 35 features Tsvetana Dimitrova, who hails from Sofia, Bulgaria. Tsvetana works in academia. Her PhD is in Linguistics and she works at the Bulgarian Academy of Science in the Linguistics department.
She is the editor of a business newspaper, called the Bulgarian Daily. Tsvetana is also a member of the Executive Board of the Bulgarian Stuttering Association.
It is safe to say that this is one busy woman. I am privileged she took time late one night (to accommodate the 6-hour time difference) to share parts of her stuttering journey.
Listen in as Tsvetana shares memories from her childhood stuttering, early speech therapy experiences and family support. We also discuss public speaking,and how challenging and stressful it can be. She shares how she initially didn’t think she could succeed at speaking publicly as a woman who stutters, but happily proved herself wrong!
We also discuss Toastmasters, which is a world-wide organization to help people from all walks of life improve public speaking and communication skills. Her self-help group is aligned with Toastmasters, and all of the members are people who stutter. They record their speeches and post them on You Tube, to encourage, inspire and learn from each other. Tsvetana has also appeared on television, reporting about her experience using the Speech Easy device.
This was a great, honest conversation infused with some humor. Listen for when Tsvetana reminds us that “Stuttering is not a disease. You can’t catch it.” Words of wisdom!
Credit for the podcast safe music clip “Fireproof Babies” goes to ccMixter.
About Colors
Posted on: November 16, 2010
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I had the chance to see the Tyler Perry directed movie “For Colored Girls” on its opening weekend. It is the film version of a play written by Ntozake Shange called, For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow is Enuf. It ran on Broadway in the 70’s.
I had heard that it was a dramatic swing from the usual comedy of Tyler Perry, of “Madea” and” Diary of a Mad Black Woman” fame. I like message movies and the stellar cast promised brilliance, which did not disappoint.
It was a stunning movie – so much so that I wished I had seen the theater version. Perry adapted the play so that the film told the story of seven black women each going through their own private hell. Their lives dramatically intersect, and we see glimpses of joy and hope.
The stage version included what is called a “choreopoem”, the merging of about 20 poems which illustrates each woman’s story. Perry handled that masterfully in the film version, allowing the beauty of the poetry to help each woman speak her truth.
For that is what the movie was really about. I heard and read that some people thought it was just another “black movie” and that it was exclusively about the black female experience. I didn’t see it like that at all. What I saw and heard was the experience of person-hood from the perspective of women. So I did a little research.
The stage version had all of the characters represented as literal colors – there was the “Brown Lady”, the “Blue Lady”, the “Purple Lady”, etc. The authors original intent was to portray women in all the different colors of our lives, not necessarily just as “women of color”. The reference to “For Colored Girls” doesn’t mean just skin color – it is much more than that.
One reviewer of the film, (see full article here) writing about how Perry adapted the stage version and got it right, says, “It has to do with mood, heart, spirit, experience, emotion, and expression — our standing or the lack thereof. I think when we understand women correctly, society changes. When women understand ourselves correctly, we change society”.
I found this perspective, and the movie, to be so very insightful about women in general. Regular readers of this blog know that I am a woman who stutters. I started a podcast for women who stutter to tell their stories, and share their truths, and to recognize the value of just that, having a space to share.
All of us need to understand and be understood. This applies to both men and women, of course. Women have always had less space, less voice, and we need to seize the opportunities we can to tell our stories. The more we share our truths, whatever those truths are, the more we understand and help each other.
The more we talk about whatever it is that we previously felt only shame, guilt, fear or failure, the easier it gets to make it just a part of our truth and who we are.
That’s what this movie did for me. It reminded me that we are unique and complex. Our lives are fabrics weaved from our emotions, experiences and expressions. No matter what issue we have that makes us feel flawed, we need to express ourselves and our truth. Only then can we have an understanding of all of the “colors” of our lives.
If stuttering had been one of the colors in the stage version, I think I would have liked it to be “The Color Green”, representing harmony and peace.
My Covert Career – Episode 34
Posted on: November 12, 2010
Episode 34 features Patrice Nolan, who hails from Bennington, Vermont. Patrice and I have been good friends since meeting at a NSA conference several years ago. We realized we only lived about an hour from each other, and have visited each other many times over the last several years.
Patrice has been a Speech Language Pathologist (SLP) in the Vermont and Massachusetts schools for 33 years. She is also a certified teacher for the hearing impaired. Throughout her career as a SLP, she has kept her stuttering hidden. Until attending her first NSA conference, Patrice didn’t even realize what covert stuttering was, despite being in the speech field.
Join us as we discuss what Patrice refers to as her covert career and how she has managed to pull that off as a SLP. She shares honestly about how much energy she has spent on avoidance and rehearsal, her main techniques to appear fluent. We discuss how listening can be compromised when constantly rehearsing what she is going to say.
Patrice also shares about her first therapy experiences as an adult, which she refers to as “The Other Side of the Table.” And we discuss a TV program that Patrice loved as a kid. It may have been the first weekly television program that featured a regular character who stuttered, depicted positively.
This was a great conversation with a friend, who realized that it was not as hard as she thought to share her story. Feel free to leave comments or ask questions or just let Patrice know what a great job she did.
Credit for the podcast safe music clip “Echoed” goes to ccMixter.
Why Be Angry? – Episode 33
Posted on: November 5, 2010
Episode 33 features Sadia Khan, who hails from Brampton, Ontario, Canada, by way of Pakistan when she was just 3 years old.
Sadia is a Grade 3 teacher, which was a life-long dream. Teaching is meaningful for Sadia, as she was told in high school that she should not be a teacher because of her stuttering. Her guidance counselor told her she would be a poor role model.
Listen in to this fascinating conversation about being a teacher who stutters despite having a very negative experience herself in school. Sadia shares about her fear of judgment and largely keeping her stuttering hidden from work colleagues. She shares how important it is for her today as a teacher to create a place of comfort and safety for all of her students.
We also talk about how angry she was with her dad for many years, and how she finally let go of that anger and forgave her dad. Sadia tells us about how she was naturally left-handed and her dad forced her to become right-handed. She thought maybe that trauma of having that change forced upon her was why she started stuttering.
Sadia has been involved with the Canadian Stuttering Association, and gave a speech about her journey with being a woman and teacher who stutters. She has also spoke on the radio about stuttering.
At the end, we have a great back and forth about learning how to build confidence as women who stutter.
As always, please feel free to leave comments for Sadia. Please tell her what a great job she did sharing her story. I think many teachers who stutter will be inspired by Sadia’s courage to share.
Credit for the podcast safe music clip “Firebabies” goes to ccMixter.
Episode 32 features Leana S. Wen, who currently lives in Boston, MA. She was born in China and lived in Shanghai until she was 9,when her family moved to the United States.
Leana is a resident physician at the Harvard Affiliated Emergency Medicine Residency at Brigham & Women’s/Massachusetts General Hospital. A Rhodes Scholar and graduate of Washington University School of Medicine, Dr. Wen has worked at WHO and has conducted research in the UK, Rwanda, South Africa, and China. She is deeply interested in public health and influencing world health policy.
From 2005 to 2006, Dr. Wen served as the national president of the American Medical Student Association, which has over 65,000 members. At that time, Leana recalls deeply reflecting on her stuttering. She had many public speaking challenges and worried if she had what it took to be a physician and president of the prestigious AMSA.
Listen in to an inspiring conversation about covert stuttering and confronting fear,and learning how to be a person who stutters. We also chat about focusing on fluency to the detriment of other things and why she sought speech therapy as an adult.
In spite of her accomplishments and her acceptance of stuttering, Leana honestly admits that it is very hard to show stuttering to her colleagues in medicine.
Besides being a wonderful speaker, Leana is also a dancer and a gifted writer. Check out this blog she co-wrote for the New York Times, Two For The Road. She also wrote about her stuttering journey for the National Stuttering Association’s May/June issue of Letting Go 2008. Leana’s article is on pages 4-5.
Credit for the podcast safe music clip “Echoed” goes to ccMixter.
Feel free to leave comments or questions for Leana. And for Pam – it is important for me to get feedback too!
Episode 31 features Darlene Brown, who hails from Beltsville, MD, by way of Buffalo and Albany, New York. I first met Darlene in Albany several years ago, when we both attended therapy at The College of St Rose.
Darlene took a break from college when she was studying speech language pathology. She came home to Albany to spend time with her family and attended group at St Rose when I was there.
One vivid memory I have about meeting Darlene was the night when her parents came to observe group. She wanted her parents to understand that her feelings and attitudes about stuttering were not just “her thing”, but that other stutterers shared similar feelings. That was so significant to me, that she felt comfortable enough to have her mom and dad there. She talks about that in our conversation.
Listen in as we also chat about the challenges and opportunities of being a SLP who stutters, being an adult in therapy, designing your own “therapy outside of therapy”, and what Darlene has learned about Darlene.
Credit for the musical clip “Scott Waves His Salty Grace To April” goes to ccMixter.
Please feel free to leave feedback for Darlene. She would love to hear what you thought. (There are a few squeaks and squelches from static that I could not remove. I still have so much to learn about audio editing!)
Episode 30 features Nina Zito, who hails from Queens, New York. Nina is 21 years old and is in her last year at St Joseph’s College in Brooklyn NY. She is studying to become an elementary school teacher.
I was introduced to Nina through friend and NSA member, Dr Mitchell Trichon. Mitch had met Nina at a NSA support group and told me that this young woman had an amazing story and that I should meet her.
I did get the chance to meet Nina and her mom and brother at the NSA conference this summer in Cleveland. I was so impressed that Nina’s family came with her for her first conference, and I was so happy to meet such an enthusiastic, ambitious young woman.
Nina has some huge speaking challenges ahead of her this year. She is student teaching and is President of her Student Government at her college. Listen as she explains how she manages this and makes room for stuttering in her life.
Listen in also as we chat about advertising, fluency communication and all that it entails, and Nina’s very inspiring story about being high school graduation salutatorian. She also offers heartfelt advice to teen girls who stutter.
Music used in this episode is podcast safe music from Dano Songs.
Feel free to leave comments or ask Nina questions.
Episode 29 features Suzana Jelčić Jakšić who hails from Zagreb, Croatia. Suzana has been a speech therapist for over 20 years, and currently works in a children’s hospital.
Suzana shares an important turning point in her life – both as a person who stutters and professionally as a therapist. She attended a workshop for specialists in stuttering and realized that she “didn’t have to be fluent”. That other therapists who stuttered were talking and expressing themselves.
She felt free to speak and to stutter if it happened. From then, she began accepting invitations to speak publicly. She felt comfortable to educate others about her specialty – stuttering.
Ten years ago, Suzana created and founded the Croatian Stuttering Association. She served as the Chair of the association up until last Spring. She is currently on the Board of the International Stuttering Association.
Listen in as we discuss Suzana’s early memories of stuttering, her parent’s reactions and early therapy experiences. We also discuss how stuttering is perceived in Croatia and important people in Croatia who stutter and have served as role models.
Suzana also mentions Marilyn Monroe and about the difference between her female and male clients. She believes that women seem to be able to deal with stuttering easier than men!
Credit for the podcast safe music clip “Echoed” goes to ccMixter.
As always, feel free to leave comments and let Suzana know what a great job she did by sharing her story!
Speaking Of Courage – Episode 28
Posted on: October 1, 2010
Episode 28 features Carolina Ayala,who hails from Toronto, Ontario, Canada. Carolina works supporting people with intellectual disabilities. She is passionate about putting a positive spin on the label”disability”, and shares her personal perception of stuttering as a disability.
Carolina attended York University in Toronto and fulfilled the requirements in 2009 for a Master of Arts in the graduate program in Critical Disability Studies. She wrote a thesis research paper on stuttering, identity and acceptance.
I met Carolina at a NSA Conference in New Jersey in 2008, but really got to know her better this year at the NSA Conference in Cleveland. We spent a lot of time talking and she gave me a copy of her thesis research paper. I read it over the summer and asked Carolina to consider sharing her story in this forum.
Listen in as we discuss self image, friends and fitting in, discrimination, authenticity, or as Carolina puts it, being robbed of her true self. Carolina also discusses her role as a child in a documentary about stuttering called “Speaking of Courage.” And she reminds us of the importance of “listen to what I say, not how I say it.”
Credit for the podcast safe music “Scott Waves to April’s Salty Grace” goes to ccMixter.
Feel free to leave comments. Carolina would be especially interested if anyone would like to further discuss her thesis research on stuttering as related to a disability. She welcomes feedback or questions.
Episode 27 features Aileen, who hails from Long Island, New York. Aileen is a senior in high school and already finding it unbelievable that she will be heading off to college next year.
Aileen is a member of Friends and an active mentor for Friends through the Stepping Up program. She has done classroom presentations and compiled ideas for other kids about talking openly about stuttering.
I had the chance to hear Aileen share part of her story at the Friends Convention held this past summer in Chicago. I was so impressed with her willingness to help others by sharing her personal journey. I was honored when Aileen accepted my invitation to share her story with us.
Listen in as we chat about positive therapy, moving from embarrassment to acceptance and the impact Friends has had on her perspective and attitude. Aileen has tremendous insight into her stuttering and its place in her life already!
I noticed in my dialogue with Aileen that I used a lot of filler words – lots of “uhms” and “like”, which I was not comfortable with! In my listen-back, it seemed I was trying to avoid more stuttering. Wonder why?
Credit for the podcast safe music clip “Echoed” goes to ccMixter.
As always, please feel free to leave comments and especially let Aileen know what a great job she did!
Make Room For The Stuttering 
What people are saying!